The casualties haven’t been lives but our thoughts and ideas as we’ve tried to write and share them with each other.
It’s taken almost 200 years but the war is being won.
By the end of the night, I had met about 16 different men, and I can tell you that the look of disappointment that flashed on their faces upon seeing me never got old.
I tried my best to be my most "top" self (like trying to polish a turd, as they say).
One gentleman, for example, interrupted me halfway throughout our introductions and asked with a smile, "Are you a Greek god? I gave him the ol' side eye and sipped out of my beer suspiciously. "I would love to take you back to my apartment to photograph you." Flattered, and with a bit of beer foam dribbling out of my mouth, I politely declined.
" Convinced I had misheard him, I asked him to repeat that. I know how that scenario usually ends: a rain coat, an axe and "Hip to Be Square" by Huey Lewis and the News blasting from a stereo.
By the time I got to the handsomest man in the room, I could tell we were both exhausted.
Enjoy presentations about the history of coding (from Morse code to today’s 1’s and 0’s), the horror of HP Lovecraft, and long-time presenter Seth Porges attempts to tell as many stories as he can in 20 minutes.
It was incredibly refreshing to meet people in real life, for once.
Stretching my social muscles was a good exercise, and it's fun trying to make strangers laugh.
"I mean, I don't blame them, but it's not like I had a choice," I continued thinking to myself while mindlessly nodding along to what my fifth date was saying. Once everyone had registered, our organizer separated us into our respective groups. Whereas I tried to look as though I had just gotten off my fancy job as a writer, a majority of the men looked as though they had just left their shift at Aeropostale. Why were they dressed like that dude from high school who always tries to sell you knives when you run into him every trip back home?
"The online 'bottoms' sign-up sheet was all filled up! If I wanted to sail with the boys on this gay Noah's ark, I had to maybe fib to myself a little." And look where that got me. If you learn anything from me at all, it's that you should always dress how you want to feel, not how you actually feel.
The event, which was held in the confines of a cavernous bar downtown, had a surprisingly large turnout. " I looked at my name tag, which was peeling off already, as if it knew that the "T" written on it was all some horrible lie. That, and never buy knives from that dude from high school.